My latest, self-imposed and oft regretted, project of assisting in the happy evolution of my fellow humans, via an easy ‘9 step’ how to programme; to slay loneliness and find in the treasure trove a universal language for improved connection and understanding…hopefully, resulting in increased well-being, popularity and feelings of inclusion (thus shoving aside feelings of alienation and boosting the feelings of connection and RSPV invites to nice parties) for us all….is not going particularly well. Since its conception my time alloted to this project has been as follows;
Time spent formulating coherent ideas and conclusions for my research about popularity = 0
Time spent getting in a tangle with conflicting ideas = 150 hours
Time spent feeling squished with the outpouring of available information and wallowing in feelings of inadequacy at my ability to analyse the data = well…quite a lot actually.
Time spent wondering whether being popular is all it is cracked up to be = 20 hours
My muse at this time seems to be the Catherine wheel of life experiences that go by the name of coincidence. Or perhaps, more accurately, observation. The kind of happenstance that is down to what you focus on. Focus is selective. If humans where to see everything going on around them they would go bonkers. So much external information sucked into our eyes and configured to some sort of understanding by our brain is subjective to our current experience. We see only that brought to life by a narrow ray of light and a very limited range of zoom, to keep our heads from exploding and to enable us to get stuff done. If our magnifying glass moves a few degrees over then we may well hear that word we’ve just learnt in the lyrics of others or on postered billboards or read it coincidentally that very day in a book, but in actual fact they’ve been there all along. Everything is all going on simultaneously and history meets future whilst languishing in the present. So, just because I am thinking about popularity I am getting goosebumps at the amount of times POPULARITY (or the academic and emotional showcase of it) is shooting into my portal of vision. So now I’m drowning in the tomes and blogs of research..I suspect which I’ve only encountered a nano fraction of. Argh!
I will continue undaunted…if not just because it is raining and it is a good excuse not to go for my morning exercise or any other distraction away from something even more challenging that it is being thoroughly useful for.
So, to today…and my current rumination on whether it is better to just do what you need to do and amuse yourself with the belief we fundamentally stand alone on the soil, and see the company of others along the promenade of life as a bonus…… and worry ye not of the number of people you can count on your hands that love you in BOTH grotty and graceful times. Or should I to make the art of social integration a primary focus and see it as a skill to be learned and honed much as the learning of wiring a plug or the steps of a new zumba dance? This mornings cud resulted in the former, and was backed up by the brilliant writing of a chocolate maker in Canada. Her thoughts are here for your delectation; I particularly enjoyed the last paragraph, and also have to admit to a experiencing a childish, reactionary tickle to the use of a four letter work in the first sentence.
‘Let’s force our brilliant plans/craziest chocolates/most revolutionary schemes/wildest dreams into the mainstream, let’s overwhelm it with our complicated notions of what a life can be. Let’s shove aside everything horrible that was. Instead of infighting with perceived allies who are useless, let us walk alone on individual paths of strength. Anarchy is what I’m talking about, naturally. Not wallowing in government-mandated fear and heartsickness, but simply sidestepping the awfulness all around in favor of something astonishingly beautiful, perfectly new: Us. We are the revolutionaries our parents pretended they were. Let’s get to it.’ Rousing, eh?! If you want to read the whole post then click on the link http://blog.lagusta.com/2011/09/05/the-new-plan/#comment-7100
I use the Interweb for a strong stake to which I can bind and support my findlings of life. One of bloggers that I stalk, for instance is my go-to hub for a perspective of life that makes me laugh like a drain – is this chick – http://girlonthecontrary.com/2011/08/16/im-a-magnet-for-awkwardness/ have a click about, she’s as funny as they come (disclaimer: this is not rigid fact so do not try to sue me for mis-advertising. Heck, I’m not even advertising, I’m sharing my humbled opinion as it currently stands. Blink and I may’ve gone off on another tangent)
That shared with you dear reader, I now bravely continue as a warrior in gold ballet pumps, with no fear for the outcome that may result in my discovering that all humans are crazy horses so forcing me to move to a small uninhabited island with 15 cats for company and a lifetimes supply of spicy pepperdew poppers (get my recipe here…http://aveganobsession.blogspot.com/2011/08/party-popers-bite-you-back-stuffed.html!….) an audio course of ‘how to learn latin’ an MP3 with a few well-chosen songs (along with a handsome male zumba teacher to teach me diva grooves to ‘moves like Jagger'[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEPTlhBmwRg]) and the Disney tune from my childhood about bluebirds being on my shoulder, and a white Eames sofa, if I conclude that humans are a pain in the ass and rather a lot of bother.
But, before that, I offer to you the words of the God of Reggae himself, Mr Bob Marley..
He may have begun that with ‘mon’ and added a few ‘reet on, ma blood’ but within the shell of a nut, tis what he said…probably…(I obviously didn’t hear it straight from the stallion’s mouth). In this instance, my profoundly academic source was the Waitrose weekend magazine..a rag of indepth knowledge, TV scheduling and steam pudding recipes.
Will you help me to untangle and throw a few of your own insights or questions at me? I write to connect with you and unashamedly (cringe) become more popular and liked (and I stick my fingers in my ears to any notion that this may bring about the shunned opposite effect), which is a continuing thow-back from junior school..and perhaps a need that never flies to coop. Has it flown yours? How?